Chaplain's Corner
Resolving Inner Conflict— For Your Mental Health… A Continuing Series
One Thing it’s Wise to Worry About
The officer asked, “I won’t go to hell if I pray, right?”
Prayer is talking to God. Yet even Satan talks with God, and Satan is destined for hell. So, talking to God keeps no one from hell; nothing we do can save us from hell. Only perfection is let into heaven; sin keeps us out. What we do think, say, or do which is wrong in God’s eyes, we can’t erase by doing good. It must be paid for.
Only Jesus wipes sin away, by his gift of dying on the cross to pay for it. Like any gift, we choose to accept it or not: “The wages of sin is death (hell), but the free gift of God is eternal life (heaven), through Christ Jesus” (Romans 6:23). Only the Christian God died for people, to offer heaven; no other religion’s founder did this!
Answering the above officer’s question: only one prayer keeps us from hell; it’s when we sincerely tell God something like:
“God, I sin, so can’t save myself from hell, but know that you love me, died for me, and paid for all my past, present, and future sin. I accept your offered gift of eternal life, by accepting Jesus’s sacrifice for me. Thank you. Now help me to get to know you, to understand you better, and your plan for me....”
This is the only kind of belief and prayer that keeps one from hell. It’s wise to consider where we’ll go after death if we address it now, accepting Christ as the only way to heaven! Then, there’s no further worry. As he said: “I am the way, the truth, and life. No one comes to the Father in heaven, except by me.”—Jesus, recorded in John 14:6.
If you’ve any question, I’d love to hear from you.
“This article was based on one of 100+ free leaflets on the AJA website, written specifically for correctional staff. Topics cover: After a Jail Incident, Experiencing Loss, Communication, Emotions, Health, Marriage, Parenting, Suicide Prevention, and Spiritual Matters. Download any for yourself, your family, and your staff at: AJA.org–Publications–Wellness–Printable Brochures.
As I rove our jail, staff share about their service, families, hobbies, hopes, disappointments, and joys.
If we were to talk, what might you mention? What thoughts do you replay? Do they encourage or upset you?
In corrections, you hear threats. You witness and handle serious incidents. These can prompt anxious thoughts: “What if that happens again?” “What could happen next?”
You’re trained and alert against danger. You can apply that same vigilence to thoughts which otherwise negatively impact your mood and mental health.
You can learn to quickly identify a thought as unworthy of your time and emotion and take control to replace it with an uplifting alternative.
Thoughts to kick out the door
Positive people generally don’t focus on upsetting memories, or worries, which impede a healthy outlook. They also distract—causing opportunities to be missed, or risks to increase.
THE PAST: If a memory is positive, fun, or instructive to learn from—it’s healthy to think about! In contrast, replaying negative events mires you in a past you can’t erase; it’s done. Regret and anger waste time, and deplete mental and physical energy. Worse: your body doesn’t know it’s a memory; it thinks the reimagined event is real, so gets stressed.
THE FUTURE: Worry is about the future, e.g. “I may be mandated,” because (correctly), the future is not in our control. Worrying won’t change things, but wastes time, energy, and heaps unnecessary punishment on our mind and body.
Instructive Discovery
Penn State researcher had participants log their specific worries for 10 days. Four times daily, they were texted to record worries from the past two hours, to note as many as possible. Each evening for 30 days, they reviewed their list to see which worries came true.
Researchers included only those worries that could be tested in the 30-day period—e.g., “I’ll fail tomorrow’s exam” was testable, but “I’ll develop cancer in my lifetime” was not. Participants averaged 3 to 4 testable worries per day.
The result? A whopping 91% of worries never occured. Of the 9% that did, one-third had outcomes better than imagined. For 25% of the participants, 0% of their worries materialized.
Researchers concluded: just because we consider something, doesn’t make it real.
“It’s worry’s deceit,” in the words of study authors LaFreniere and Newman. “Deceit” is a good word for worry, which demands we pay attention to something which is nearly always a false alarm. Our Enemy loves us to do this—diminish joy and put us at risk; Satan is a deceiver (2nd John 1:7), who tries to “kill, steal, and destroy” our lives and joy (John 10:10).
Suggestion: keep track of your worries, and how they turn out. Seeing that few come true can help to stop unwarranted fretting. Deceit is never good, so why lie to yourself?
Protective Barriers
Correctional staff know the security of locked doors. Similarly, author Jim Rohn asserted, “Guard the door of your mind. Whatever we feed our mind, we’ll experience as real; it’s your choice what to focus on.”
Rather than let thoughts rule you, God instructs us to“Take every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ” (2nd Corinthians 10:5). Since he created us and our capabilities, it’s possible: we can control our thinking, with his help.
His solution is a simple process, but isn’t easy; you might have to do it many times daily, for weeks, until you develop this new thinking habit. As with everything we learn in life, it becomes easier the more it’s practiced. God’s solution is to replace negative memories and worries by….(wait for it): giving thanks!
The Replacement Principle
When you realize you’re thinking an unproductive thought, trying to “just stop” won’t do. You must replace it with a positive one—and there’s no simpler, positive truth than: “God is with me and loves me; I can trust him.” He promises peace, by trusting him: “You will keep the person in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on God, when he trusts in You” (Isaiah 26:3).
He also instructs:“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, pray with thanksgiving, presenting your requests to God, and his peace will guard your hearts and minds. Think about what is true and noble…lovely..admirable..praiseworthy” (Philippians 4:6-8).
Doing a 180
Gloomily, the officer said, “I keep worrying I’ll make a mistake and be suspended, or lose my job, maybe even my pension.”
I shared the replacement principle and asked what good thing—right then—he was thankful for. He said, “My family, lunch, and vacation plans.” He was able to list things he appreciated, and began smiling. He simply chose to change his mental focus.
A Second God-solution
When upset by someone, if we mentally yell at them, or gripe about them to others, this will degrade our spirit, energy, health—maybe even our reputation. The perpetrator may be oblivious to our ire, while we’ve enslaved ourself to fury or fear.
Instead, God’s wise directive is, “Love your enemy; pray for those who persecute you,” (Matthew 5:43). “Enemy” may be a strong word to describe your offender, but if we’re to love enemies, then certainly God wants us to love anyone—a bad politician, unpleasant partner, or rebellious child.
The way to “love” anyone is in 1st Corinthians 13: be kind, patient, not rude, and hold no grudge! Instead of wallowing in hostility, you can pray for them—perhaps asking God to bless them with truth and wisdom. Praying also reminds us that we’re not alone in any situation; God is present and cares.
Praying for your enemy enables three things:
• First, you please God (which is always good), because it’s obeying his command to pray for your enemy.
• Second, as you pray for someone, you can’t grip as strongly onto the anger, spite, or worry. Your attitude, mind, and body relax.
• Third, God may answer your prayer and change them, or improve the situation!
Next Steps
During an upcoming 24-hour period, make a—perhaps written—inventory of your thought-topics.
Later, analyze them.
Are they predominantly life-giving or life-draining?
Rather than give a platform to the Devil’s past meddling, and false fears, choose to follow God’s loving guidance: choose good thoughts.
You demonstrate this self-control with inmates: you might want to say or do something defensive or offensive, but your training enables professional restraint. You don’t take their bait.
Give this same care to yourself. Guard your mind. Lock out the negative. Every day, swing open the door to appreciate positive memories, good things, people, and plans. You can develop this healthy mental habit; God is ready to help. He waits to be invited, saying, “I stand at the door and knock…” (Revelation 3:20), so invite him in to help you to replace negative thoughts with gratefulness, and a reflexive ability to pray for enemies!
It’s your choice to enjoy the health and freedom of trusting his loving wisdom. n
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Chaplain Linda Ahrens Chaplain American Jail Association
Reference
Sources: www.tonyrobbins.com/podcasts/guard-your-mind; www.psychologytoday.com July 2019/how-often-do-worries-come-true; The Bible
Note: The opinions expressed in the article are my own as a volunteer chaplain and do not reflect the views of any other entity.