The Unintended Impact of the Things We Say
William Young
Many would say that one of the hardest parts of working in corrections is dealing with the other officers. We sit around and complain about the old school knuckle draggers, the thug huggers, and the door holders. We slander, shun, mock and talk about every mistake, mishap, and misstep that our fellow officers make.
We continuously second guess split-second decisions that our brothers and sisters had to make with no real knowledge of the situation or the events that led up to that particular situation. We hold grudges, spread gossip and make up rumors.
I am ashamed to admit that I have participated in a few of these conversations throughout my career and my excuses for doing so are lame. Was I just trying to fit in? Or was I so frustrated that I didn’t know how to properly handle the situation? Or was I just being a jerk? As I reflect, the latter of the three is probably the closest to the truth.
How We Treat Our Coworkers
One day I had a thought. How is it that we, as corrections professionals, maintain our composure as an inmate is screaming in our face, threatening to kill our family while they are at home sound asleep in their beds, but we can’t seem to contain our emotions when our co-worker calls out on the radio for a restroom break? We can successfully convince an incarcerated individual, who was just sentenced to 150 years, that it would be in everybody’s best interested if he would just go to his room. Yet, we want to strangle a fellow officer for forgetting to fill out some paperwork that won’t even be collected until Monday morning.
We speak of rehabilitation and re-entry in regards to our clientele. We use patience and professionalism when dealing with the incarcerated. We acknowledge that some behaviors have a root cause and that the screaming, banging, wall punching individual claiming to hear voices telling him to scream, bang, and punch might actually be hearing voices.
Correctional Fatigue
Why don’t we use that same logic, empathy and understanding when dealing with our co-workers?
For me the answer is simple. I just don’t care. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I don’t care about my fellow officers because I do. I honestly love each and every one of them. When I pray, I pray that they all make it home safe and sound at the end of their respective shifts. When I say I don’t care, what I really mean to say is that I’m so emotionally burned out that I have nothing left to give. What I mean when I say that I don’t care is that I have wasted all of my patience and professionalism and compassion during the first half of my mandatory double shift. In other words, I am in the throes of Correctional Fatigue.
I think that this is true for a lot of us. We are tired, stressed, and missing our families, so we lash out on those closest to us. We don’t take the concerns of our fellow officers into consideration because all we can think about is home. Our only concern is how we can get out of here unscathed and on time. We seem to forget that the officer that forgot to submit her paperwork in a timely fashion didn’t forget because she was being lazy, she forgot because she just found out that her vacation request was denied and she will miss her son’s basketball tournament this weekend. We seem to forget that the officer we are currently frustrated with might be the very same officer that saves our life.
Because of our fatigue and because we are cynical by nature, we automatically assume that EVERYONE is working some sort of angle. We assume that when our fellow officers call in sick that they are abusing an earned benefit. Their poor work ethic disgusts us. We speculate as to why they aren’t at work. We say that they’re “sick” because it is payday or because they had to work in an undesirable location within the facility. We say that they’re scared of the population or of work. We say many things because we are upset that we are here and they are not.
What we don’t is that maybe their child is sick and that their significant other couldn’t stay home this time. What we don’t say is that maybe they really are sick. What we don’t do, at least consistently, is check on them to see if everything is okay.
Here’s What I’m Asking You To Do
I need you to acknowledge and understand that the environment that we work in and the things that we are subjected to change us. The stress, spitting, swearing, and silence affect all of us in very different ways. It’s okay not to be okay with the things we see and hear.
I need you to try and give your fellow officers the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they did not call off because they are lazy or scared. Maybe they did so because they just found out that a close relative had passed away. Maybe their spouse has been unfaithful or maybe their children are being bullied at school. Maybe their dog died. Or maybe, they just couldn’t do it today. Maybe they couldn’t handle the noise, threats, and politics. Maybe they knew they were going to work a mandatory double shift and miss another parent-teacher conference. Maybe it is worse than all of that.
Or maybe they are being lazy. Maybe they’re staying home because it is payday and they want to go shopping instead of going to work. I’m telling you that the reason should be of no consequence to you. I know that it feels like it directly affects your life but it really doesn’t. What does affect your life is the bond; the foundation that we build with each other. What matters is the way we interact with each other. Let us bestow a little empathy and compassion upon our fellow officers because when things spin out of control and all hell breaks loose, WE ARE ALL WE HAVE.
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William Young has worked as a Correctional Officer since March of 2005. He has worked throughout his facility in various areas ranging from Sanitation to Segregation and is currently assigned to Community Corrections. He is a part-time training instructor, teaching courses, such as Emergency Preparedness, Stress Management, and Motivational Interviewing. He is the author of two books, When Home Becomes a Housing Unit and The Nothing That Never Happened. Both books highlight the way that the correctional environment can negatively affect an officer on the outside, in his/her personal life. He can be contacted at justcorrections@gmail.com